Abstract thoughts
Dear readers,
It has been such a long time since letters blotted these pages of pixels. Invisibly these pages have turned dusty, brown and old. I hope these new words will rejuvenate the passion that fuels the 'world of small things'.
For the first time, no burning thought is steering my mind.Random abstract thoughts compelled me to write. I guess and hope that this post will induce a feeling of being lost in the undefined beauty of an abstract painting. Scattered and odd, but igniting the flame of thoughts.
Now I stand at the very verge of that voluntary leap into the unknown abyss of the real world.And my feelings are no different from the literal situation. Pumped by adrenaline but bound by the fear of the darkness of the depths below.
There are some things in my life that seem so insignificant, but have a profound effect on me. For example, the view from my window.Those who have read a few of my previous posts are familiar with the fact that my window is like a pinhole camera for me.A small opening to the colourful world. The green marshes in the rain and the rustic dryness in the summer has often left me spellbound.Sadly,that has changed. 'Development' has maligned the beauty of that same view.Dwellings of asbestos seems like that ripple in the water that obscures the reflection of the azure sky above. The slaved claws of humans have made sure that those grasses will never turn luscious and green again.But then I think of that blind man who let loose the beauty of dales,hills,lakes clouds and daffodils.I convince myself is that the real joy is experienced when you create a world out of nought.Order out if chaos. 'ordo ab chao'--- the masonic saying now seems beautifully true.
One day I was sitting in the car with the seat reclined perfectly to keep the evening sky in focus and the people out of the frame. The fiery hues of the sky set my mind racing. I seemed to be in a conversation with myself. 'Why are you not watching the worldly activities going on around you?',my mind questioned me. 'What am I to gain watching people working with self centered motivation? I inaudibly snapped back in a rebuking tone. This world is purposeless.We were made to be imperfect.Those imperfections make our lives purposeful.It gives us something to strive for.I soon adjusted my seat and watched the people around me. So many lives.So many souls.So many minds. When I saw mothers with their children, I saw unbreakable bonds.When I saw construction workers talking in unhushed tones, I realised that friendship bonds us as a family,irrespective of shallow medallions of social status. I realised that this world is a masterpiece, nature applied the strokes,the people are the colours or the strands of cloth of canvas, waiting to be coloured.
A one week vacation has come to an end. These breathers allow you to introspect and contemplate. Such contemplation is a truly gratifying experience. When we run this marathon of life, we need to stop and look around. I strongly disagree with those who say that we should not look back. If we solely carry on forward without looking back, then in the end, we will be filled with a crushing emptiness that will leave us with a repentant soul and a heavy heart. When you look back, you see how long a way you have come. It makes you feel that you have honed yourself. However small the improvement, the satisfaction will impart life energy to you. You will be able to answer the most difficult question you will ask yourself when you finish this seemingly unending voyage:- 'What have I achieved in my life?'
I did not read many books in these holidays. I did scan through the many rows of books in the stores. Somehow nothing stopped me in my tracks. None of the blurbs interested me. I think that it is a result of my fluctuating tastes.I suddenly thought of Anton Chekhov's short story, 'the bet' which portrays a person in voluntary confinement whose tastes in books varied dynamically.Comparing myself,found eerie similarities. I seem to be attracted to slow paced,philosophical plots rather than racy thrillers which used to keep me on the edge of my seat two years ago.Maybe my mind is attracted to things that can slow down my fast paced life.
I spent most of my vacation painting. For me it is a source of unparalleled joy.It is the joy of creation. When I was young and even now, I dream of living in the utopian world I paint. Every night, a new life starts. I live among my creations. Heavenly.
A positive change I can see in myself since my last post is that I have learnt to live.I have learnt to 'experience' more. To absorb the juice of every tiny existence. Live and let live is just meagre. We should live every life we perceive through our senses. Place yourself in the position of that flower on the sidewalk and imagine yourself being admired by passers-by.
In our minds, we should live the life of labourers.Feel the exertion they feel and the joy of relaxing after a day of tedious labour.Then all our prejudices, jealousy and misery will dissolve into the mounting satisfaction and joy. We will realize that this world is perfect even if the inhabitants are not.The place where the beauty lies are the imperfections itself.
It does not matter from what dire states we start from,the end will be satisfying. I know you have your doubts in this age old saying. I too thought of it as a way of shifting reality.But this is a fundamental fact of the functions of nature. The sunlit summit will be preceded by a dark dale. 'Do not tell me in mournful numbers that life is but an empty dream' is what we should say to pathetic pessimists. Look how we started this write up. We started in a random chain of thoughts and end in completion and on a gleeful note.Abstractness conveys completion. Ordo ab chao...Order from chaos.
It has been such a long time since letters blotted these pages of pixels. Invisibly these pages have turned dusty, brown and old. I hope these new words will rejuvenate the passion that fuels the 'world of small things'.
For the first time, no burning thought is steering my mind.Random abstract thoughts compelled me to write. I guess and hope that this post will induce a feeling of being lost in the undefined beauty of an abstract painting. Scattered and odd, but igniting the flame of thoughts.
Now I stand at the very verge of that voluntary leap into the unknown abyss of the real world.And my feelings are no different from the literal situation. Pumped by adrenaline but bound by the fear of the darkness of the depths below.
There are some things in my life that seem so insignificant, but have a profound effect on me. For example, the view from my window.Those who have read a few of my previous posts are familiar with the fact that my window is like a pinhole camera for me.A small opening to the colourful world. The green marshes in the rain and the rustic dryness in the summer has often left me spellbound.Sadly,that has changed. 'Development' has maligned the beauty of that same view.Dwellings of asbestos seems like that ripple in the water that obscures the reflection of the azure sky above. The slaved claws of humans have made sure that those grasses will never turn luscious and green again.But then I think of that blind man who let loose the beauty of dales,hills,lakes clouds and daffodils.I convince myself is that the real joy is experienced when you create a world out of nought.Order out if chaos. 'ordo ab chao'--- the masonic saying now seems beautifully true.
One day I was sitting in the car with the seat reclined perfectly to keep the evening sky in focus and the people out of the frame. The fiery hues of the sky set my mind racing. I seemed to be in a conversation with myself. 'Why are you not watching the worldly activities going on around you?',my mind questioned me. 'What am I to gain watching people working with self centered motivation? I inaudibly snapped back in a rebuking tone. This world is purposeless.We were made to be imperfect.Those imperfections make our lives purposeful.It gives us something to strive for.I soon adjusted my seat and watched the people around me. So many lives.So many souls.So many minds. When I saw mothers with their children, I saw unbreakable bonds.When I saw construction workers talking in unhushed tones, I realised that friendship bonds us as a family,irrespective of shallow medallions of social status. I realised that this world is a masterpiece, nature applied the strokes,the people are the colours or the strands of cloth of canvas, waiting to be coloured.
A one week vacation has come to an end. These breathers allow you to introspect and contemplate. Such contemplation is a truly gratifying experience. When we run this marathon of life, we need to stop and look around. I strongly disagree with those who say that we should not look back. If we solely carry on forward without looking back, then in the end, we will be filled with a crushing emptiness that will leave us with a repentant soul and a heavy heart. When you look back, you see how long a way you have come. It makes you feel that you have honed yourself. However small the improvement, the satisfaction will impart life energy to you. You will be able to answer the most difficult question you will ask yourself when you finish this seemingly unending voyage:- 'What have I achieved in my life?'
I did not read many books in these holidays. I did scan through the many rows of books in the stores. Somehow nothing stopped me in my tracks. None of the blurbs interested me. I think that it is a result of my fluctuating tastes.I suddenly thought of Anton Chekhov's short story, 'the bet' which portrays a person in voluntary confinement whose tastes in books varied dynamically.Comparing myself,found eerie similarities. I seem to be attracted to slow paced,philosophical plots rather than racy thrillers which used to keep me on the edge of my seat two years ago.Maybe my mind is attracted to things that can slow down my fast paced life.
I spent most of my vacation painting. For me it is a source of unparalleled joy.It is the joy of creation. When I was young and even now, I dream of living in the utopian world I paint. Every night, a new life starts. I live among my creations. Heavenly.
A positive change I can see in myself since my last post is that I have learnt to live.I have learnt to 'experience' more. To absorb the juice of every tiny existence. Live and let live is just meagre. We should live every life we perceive through our senses. Place yourself in the position of that flower on the sidewalk and imagine yourself being admired by passers-by.
In our minds, we should live the life of labourers.Feel the exertion they feel and the joy of relaxing after a day of tedious labour.Then all our prejudices, jealousy and misery will dissolve into the mounting satisfaction and joy. We will realize that this world is perfect even if the inhabitants are not.The place where the beauty lies are the imperfections itself.
It does not matter from what dire states we start from,the end will be satisfying. I know you have your doubts in this age old saying. I too thought of it as a way of shifting reality.But this is a fundamental fact of the functions of nature. The sunlit summit will be preceded by a dark dale. 'Do not tell me in mournful numbers that life is but an empty dream' is what we should say to pathetic pessimists. Look how we started this write up. We started in a random chain of thoughts and end in completion and on a gleeful note.Abstractness conveys completion. Ordo ab chao...Order from chaos.
Comments
Post a Comment